What does it mean to “be a good mother”? In reality, it isn’t really a question of morality. Nor is it the idea of there being specific things that are necessarily right or wrong within the concept of mothering. However, there are certain general guidelines that can point you in the right direction.
In this article, we’ve chosen ten tips on how to be a good mother. We suggest you read and adapt them to what you feel resonates with your own way of being and with your own personal idea of motherhood.
10 tips to be a good mother
When the journey of motherhood and parenting begins, it’s normal for certain doubts to arise. Nevertheless, being a mother is about finding some specific ideas that resonate with your own personal concept of motherhood. For this reason, without a doubt, the ten tips included in this article won’t suit everyone.
In this article, we simply want to bring a little light to the complex and fascinating path of motherhood.
Always remember that, when educating, the best criterion is your own. It can be a flexible criterion, open to experience, and one of continual learning, for this journey of yours, that lasts a lifetime.
Be guided by your intuition
There’ll be many times as a mother when you’ll feel like you don’t know if you’re doing it right or wrong. However, don’t become overwhelmed by these feelings. After all, you have the highly reliable tool of intuition at your disposal.
Trust it. Indeed, the best for your children is what you feel it is. Of course, that doesn’t mean that you can’t continue to have doubts, make mistakes and keep learning. Learning is always good.
“That is what learning is. You suddenly understand something you’ve understood your whole life, but in a new way.”
Stimulate their autonomy
Autonomy is essential for healthy psychological development. Therefore, developing it in your children will help them to mature and build themselves as people. Consequently, they’ll be able to take on increasingly greater responsibilities.
Share time with them
Spending time with your children (quality time) will strengthen your bond with them. Furthermore, it increases your own confidence. As a matter of fact, children need to spend time with their loved ones, especially during the first years of life.
Let them be wrong
Another tip for being a good mother is to let children make mistakes. It’s normal to want to protect children and to want to avoid them coming to any harm. However, making mistakes will be good for them in order to learn and improve themselves.
“He who never made a mistake never made a discovery.”
Sharing love and externalizing it… it’s important to forge bonds and to develop children’s self-esteem. That’s why it’s so important to show them love with your deeds as well as your words.
Enjoy the experience
Don’t get hung up on the idea of whether or not you’re a good mother. Just enjoy the experience. Let yourself go and do what you feel is best for your children. If you start to enjoy and relax, you’ll see that everything flows more easily.
Adapt to their age
Whether you’re talking to your children, scolding them, or teaching them something new, we recommend that you adapt to their age and stage of development.
Indeed, you know your children better than anyone and you’ll know whether they’re ready for certain tasks or not. In fact, if you’re not sure, you can always consult a professional, like a child psychologist.
Be an example
Another tip for being a good parent is to practice by example. Children, especially when they’re young, learn by example and from models (by imitating). Because of this, they’ll pay close attention to what you do or say and will probably copy you.
Therefore, if you want to teach them certain values or behaviors, be an example to them. Obviously, over time, they’ll start to look at other models, and that’s fine; but you’ll always have a tremendous influence on them.
Give them freedom
Along the same lines, and again related to the idea of autonomy – you should always give your children freedom. Obviously, this should vary, according to their age and maturity, but it’s always beneficial.
Why? Because it allows your children to act on the basis of their own criteria, make mistakes and, of course, learn.
Set limits and rules
Boundaries and norms are healthy for children’s development; They help them to identify what’s good and what isn’t. This develops their morale. Furthermore, boundaries and norms guide them when it comes to acting when they’re still very young. As a matter of fact, setting boundaries achieves a respectful yet disciplined education.
In this article, we’ve spoken about some tips for being a good mother. However, these are only indications. In fact, you can adapt them along the lines of what you feel your own children need. They’re simply a starting point from which to educate them according to your own intuition and criteria.
“Intuition will tell the thinking mind where to look next.”
-Jonas Edward Salk-
Finally, remember, you must find your own meaning of the idea of “being a good mother.” From there, continue learning and educating your children in a way that resonates with you. A way that makes you feel good, knowing that you’re also doing the best for them.